


Painful Memories

by YesCaptain



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Lots of Angst, arthur is alive woohoo, but it will get better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-09
Updated: 2016-01-09
Packaged: 2018-05-12 16:18:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5672341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YesCaptain/pseuds/YesCaptain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin and Arthur reach the Lake of Avalon in time, so they save Arthur's life. A few days later, they have a talk about who they love. (I suck at summaries... just check it out =)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

When Merlin and Arthur came back to Camelot from the lake of Avalon, it was never going to be the same again. But in a good way. Morgana is dead, and Arthur allowed light magic in Camelot. He already got use to the idea that Merlin has magic, and come to think of it, it's pretty amazing. Especially that his destiny is to protect Arthur. 

 

Probably the most happiest person to see Arthur alive and well would be Guinevere. She literally jumped on him and they both fell backwards on the cement ground. That left a bit of pain on his back. But nothing compared to the pain where he was stabbed. A couple of days later, everything went back to normal. Merlin as his servant, Arthur and Guinevere as King and Queen of Camelot. 

 

One time when Merlin was polishing Arthur's boots, he came to join Merlin. "Merlin, I told you to take a break today." 

 

Merlin looked over to him and grinned. "Then who's going to clean your dirty.. clot pole...  boots? Plus, I don't have anything else to do."

 

"Neither do I. Why don't I keep you company." Arthur said and slapped his back. (Quite hard...) 

 

Merlin tried not to make a sound but he did. A pretty loud 'Ow'. "Alright then, if you want to keep me company, what are you going to do?" Merlin asked, putting the boot down, and looking at him.

 

"Well, we could talk about something." Arthur said. he was thinking for awhile, then finally thought of something to say. "Merlin, remember when Gwen said you were seeing a girl? Why don't you tell me about her."He said with a grin. But it faded away once Merlin had a sad look on his face. "What's wrong?"

 

Merlin shook his head. "Nothing. Everything's fine. How about you tell me about Gwen?" he tried slapping Arthur's back, but failed miserably. 

 

"Well... if I tell you, will you tell me about this girl?" He asked.

 

Merlin sighed. He knows exactly how this is going to end. "Fine." He took the boot, and started to clean it once more. 

 

He grinned. "Great." There was a moment of silence when Merlin broke it. "Are you glad that she is queen? Do you think she is a good one?"

 

Arthur raised his eyebrow. "Of course I do! She is amazing, beautiful and kind hearted. Without her, this kingdom wouldn't be like it is right now."

 

"And without me, you would be dead." Merlin muttered. 

 

"Oi! I heard that." Arthur laughed. "Thank you for that. Not only have you saved my life then, you saved my life pretty much.... ever since you came to Camelot. And I didn't even know that. I'm sorry." He said.

 

Merlin smiled. "It's alright." 

 

"So tell me about this girl now. And why don't you ever talk about her?" Arthur sat a bit more comfortably, knowing that this is going to be a long conversation.

 

"What Gwen told you back then, I wasn't seeing a girl. She just said that because she was enchanted. Remember?" 

 

"Of course I remember. I also remember you disguising as an old sorceress." They both laughed at that. 

 

Merlin's face went back to a sad one. "But there still was a girl. I loved her very much. I loved her more than anything. We were planning on living near a lake. It was going to be a dream come true. But we couldn't."

 

"Why not?" Arthur asked.

 

"Because she's dead." Now Merlin has watery eyes, he can't see clearly. He blinks, then a tear falls down. 

 

"I'm... I'm so sorry Merlin." He hugged him for comfort, knowing that now wasn't the best time for jokes or hard slaps on the back. This was probably the second time Arthur has hugged Merlin. 

 

"It's fine." He goes puts the boot down, and gets the 3rd one he has to clean. 

 

"What was her name?" Arthur asks.

 

Arthur notices that it's hard for him to say it. "F..Freya... Her name is Freya."

 

Arthur nods slowly. "How did she die?" He knows he is asking too many questions, but this is Merlin's love! He's curious to know all about her. Merlin is like a brother he never had. 

 

"She... she got.. killed." Merlin tried his best not to cry, but it didn't work. 

 

Arthur's eyes widened. "Who would be cruel enough to kill a person _you_ loved?!" Now he was mad. Whoever did this is a cruel and heartless man. 

 

Merlin wiped his tears. "I can't say. You'll get really angry."

 

"I already am. Tell me. maybe I know him."

 

Merlin looked over to Arthur with sad eyes. "It was you."


	2. Chapter 2

Arthur looked over to Merlin with wide eyes. "Me? I would never hurt, let alone  _kill_ an innocent woman! What makes you think I did it?"

 

Merlin wiped his eyes furiously, a bit frustrated about the situation he is in. He promised himself never to remember the moment where she died, ad only remember the moments where she _lived._ But that could never happen, because when he thought of her, he remembered holding her near the lake, and watching her dying in his arms. "Because I saw you, Arthur. And to you, she didn't look innocent."

 

Arthur blinked a couple of time. "What do you mean? Who is she?"

 

"Why are you so interested in this girl?!" Merlin started to get annoyed by all his questions. Couldn't he see that he was in pain?!

 

"Because this is you! You... the servant. The happy... annoying... stupid servant who I never saw with a girl! And I want to know all about her because I want to know how she fell in love with you. What was your story?"

 

"That doesn't help, Arthur." They stared at each other for what seemed like forever. "Fine! You want to know who she is? Do you remember the druid girl who the bounty hunter caught, but she escaped?" 

 

"Yeah... the one that turned into that  _beast?_ " Arthur said, cooling down a bit.

 

"She's not a beast! She's a girl who was cursed with that. I'm the one who helped her escape. With her... I didn't have to hide who I was." 

 

"If you told me about your magic, you wouldn't have to hide with me either!" He said, as if it's that easy.

 

"That would just be a suicide attempt."

 

Arthur just sat there taking all the information he just heard. Then he looked back at Merlin cleaning the boots. "Would you stop that?!"

 

Is he serious? "Why are you mad at me!? I'm not the one who killed your loved one!" 

 

Arthur stayed silent for a while, then sighed. "You're right. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the way I acted, and I am so sorry for Freya. If there was some way I could help..." 

 

Merlin smiled. He knew that Arthur meant that, and he didn't mean anything he said before. At least most of it... "Well, there is one way." He smirked.

 

Arthur raised his eyebrows. "Let me guess... you want a day off?" 

 

"That.. and something else."

 

"And what is that?"

 

He knows that Arthur is going to overreact about this too, but it will be fun for both of them. "Do you promise to do it?"

 

He sighed. "Alright..."

 

Merlin grinned. "Follow me."

________________

They were standing in the middle of a field, when Merlin started to yell something which Arthur did not understand.

 

"O drakon! E male su ftengometta tesdhup anankes!" Merlin said, staring at the sky. 

 

"What the _hell_ are you doin-" Arthur didn't finish his sentence when he noticed a giant dragon fly towards them. "RUN!" He started to run when he noticed Merlin was just standing there and smiling. "Merlin, I knew you were stupid, but not this stupid! You might have magic, but it is nothing compared to a dragon!"

 

The dragon sat in front of Merlin, and bowed his head. "Hello again, young warlock. And why did you summon me?"

 

Arthur widened his eyes. " _Merlin..._ "

 

Merlin pointed towards Arthur. "I was wondering whether you can take us for a ride. I know this isn't a very important situation, but it will be good for both of us."

 

Kilgharrah bowed his head once more. "Of course."

 

Arthur took a step towards Merlin, making sure to keep some distance between him and the beast. "You... know this dragon?"

 

Merlin grinned. "I am the last Dragonlord."

 

Arthur looked very pale. "You're... what?!" Merlin nodded. "So that's why Gaius told me you were the most powerful sorcerer?" 

 

"Well.. not only that. I am magic. I can never lose my magic, because that is who I am. And I was destined to keep you safe."

 

Arthur started to rub his head. Then he stopped. "Wait. Wasn't Balinor the last Dragonlord?"

 

"Balinor was my father." He said sadly. 

 

"That's why you reacted like that when he got killed... I'm so sorry Merlin..." 

 

Merlin shrugged it off. "It's alright. I wanted to have a ride so we can just forget about the past and live the moment."

 

Arthur nodded. "Well, what are we waiting for?" 

 

They went on the dragon, and he started to fly. Merlin heard Arthur muttering something which sounded as if he said, "For the love of Camelot..." 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Thanks so much for reading this, and sticking with me here. This is the last part, and hopefully you like it! :) ~Amber

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! Thanks for checking out my fanfic. This is actually my first Merlin fanfic, so hopefully you enjoy! There will be more chapters, don't worry :P Make sure to review and leave some kudos, it brings a huge smile to my face! Thanks again, ~Amber :)


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